events of such magnitude sometimes seem so important but yet always leave you wondering how significant they really were. have you done anything important lately? has anything in your recent life truly mattered to anyone but yourself? so what if it hasn’t…who gives a fuck. people aren’t worth worrying about all day or all night, we are so frail and weak, we let so many small things crawl inside our souls and gently chew away at our inner peace and beliefs; feelings so often dictate our life in a way that we should never allow. i opened my body for one to enter and only had all my internal furniture rearranged against my will, leaving me strewn and distorted into someone else. i am not THAT person anymore. i can only open the door so much these days, if you want in, you had better knock and give me a good fucking reason why i should show any vulnerability. “this is your life, good to the last drop.” –tyler durden “i say, may i never be complete. i say, may i never be content.” –tyler durden ————– in other related news…. the new dvd player i had bought was starting to suck and piss me off, so i took it back, and of course i can’t find a suitable replacement. *sigh* so much bullshit for such simple entertainment. it put me in a bad mood for most of the evening, i was frustrated, i was angry, i was annoyed…at least i had company. i apologize for my attitude, i know i sucked for most of the evening. and then what? well, as soon as things started turning around for me and i was able to ignore my slump and feel happy again, something drastic happened to one of my friends, i have no clue, no idea, no assumption as to what, but all i know is that it was something. my comforting did no good, my voice wasn’t wanting to be heard. pain will go away, my friend, it merely takes time. people aren’t worth the time, i know it sounds hypocritical, but trust me. all they do is cause us anguish. sometimes its best to stick with the ones that truly understand, although they are far and few between. they are there, you just have to look and be patient, i suppose.