i should devote more time…however, the chills have been surging through my body since sunday…
she would glance at me…playing those chosen songs…the ones so deeply meaningful to her, and from the words i could even tell…all those secrets that are never told, things that i knew…
“by your side i’ll stay forever”
as you so nervously and intently slid your fingers across my leg, as if you were reaching for something that terrified you, that perhaps you NEEDED to know i was there…and i was. and if the music weren’t so loud, you’d have heard me gasp so deeply when you squeezed my hand so tightly when i placed it over yours…our hands were pressed together as strongly as i was wishing to be holding you in that moment. i couldn’t breathe…your fingers may as well have been holding my heart at that one instant…
you’re magical. and you’re not even aware. i’ve listened to these songs over and over since, and my stomach has been in my throat each time, i just keep reliving that one small event over and over…
“i only want you to see my favorite part of me…”
but what you don’t understand…my favorite part is EVERYTHING. the beautiful and the ugly.
shehag once told me…that maybe all i needed was someone to be there for me in the way i’m always there for them…and i feel this is it. all those words were true…that i understand it’s all you want as well…it’s why we connected, it’s why we complement each other…you’re my rock and i’m yours. and i’ve understood it…i’ve figured it out…and i see now when you only want me by your side, silent…still…just THERE. when once i mistook it for being something else, i now understand you don’t want me to talk, you don’t want me to hug you, you don’t want me trying to make it better, you don’t want anything but the sanctity of me sitting next to you while you fight your way through your own darkness, just to be there to catch you when you need it. and that’s what i’ll do.
you’re still the one held above all others. you’ll always be.
“here i am standing up to say i only want to fall in love with you…forever”
the rain DOES always bring our heroes.
xoxo.

————

thomas dunlap
i say to myself,” he knows what i’m gonna say, he must enjoy it it”

fag.
Reply4 years ago

She B
dang daniel. what the fuck was that? did you enter to win a chance to make a hallmark card??
Reply4 years ago