Jacked from dizzyhyena’s awaymsg. A woman has a close male friend. This means that he is probably interested in her, which is why he hangs around so much. She sees him strictly as a friend. This always starts out with, you’re a great guy, but I don’t like you in that way. This is roughly the equivalent for the guy of going to a job interview and the company saying, You have a great resume, you have all the qualifications we are looking for, but we’re not going to hire you. We will, however, use your resume as the basis for comparison for all other applicants. But, we’re going to hire somebody who is far less qualified and is probably an alcoholic. And if he doesn’t work out, we’ll hire somebody else, but still not you. In fact, we will never hire you. But we will call you from time to time to complain about the person that we hired.

so i dreamt of HER last night…about the only bit i remember from the dream was the she-hag, something different about it this time. i was in some new apartment and just getting ready to go inside and i felt someone behind me…and lo and behold, it was her. she grabbed me and kissed me (we were at the top of stairs) and i remember almost falling down the stairs…so we went inside and continued to kiss. shortly after that i remember someone barging in the door and then i woke up.

aquarius: Daily Overview for October 22, 2004 Provided by Astrology.com Daily Extended Forecast Quickie: So your life is a little chaotic right now. Hey, at least it isn’t boring! Overview: Within the next few days, an ostensibly ‘casual’ acquaintance you’ve been thinking about in a far more than casual manner will let you know that the feelings are mutual. Very mutual.

you know, it feels awkward thinking that i have such a crush on someone, and almost moreso to think that i’m having a “crush” but it’s almost for lack of a better term…i surprisingly had the opportunity to see this girl tonight and i gladly took the opportunity. also by the urging of some unseen hand slapping me in the face i muttered the information to her as well, “i have a crush on you.” we did end up hanging out a little longer than i expected as well, had great conversation and have gotten to know each other a little better. i still like her, she’s awesome, and regardless of my thoughts or feelings, she has a bf…i will not allow myself to believe anything, i am only happy that she didn’t leave in disgust when i admitted that i’ve had thoughts about her. i just turned my heater on in my house, it’s freakin cold. now as for my other events that were planned, nothing came through…i never received the call for going out with the girl i shared the momentary passion with last night…i hope everyone and everything is well. actually i never got the call from my friend that is the medium between us for going out, i really hope he just fell asleep and nothing else is was wrong or going on. other news…fleas are rampant in my house and driving me crazy, time to start bombing. my attempts at spraying aren’t helping matters, so things will need to be more drastic. also my stomach is officially fucked up. i keep having these urges to throw up, and it’s nothing i’m eating because i’m not eating anything unusual. it’s been this way since i got sick and threw up at work, i think something has finally become “wrong” with me. my mother has issues with teh flap from her esophagus to her stomach, and perhaps i’m having the same problems now, it feels like something in my gut isn’t cooperating. i can only hope it isn’t major and can be fixed easily and preferrably with meds and not surgery. my heart is pumping and my blood is energizing…i’m starting to surge with energy again and i’m acquiring emotional responses once more. things are clearing up and i think i’m nearing completion to allow myself to be happy and let someone touch my damaged heart. “…be careful for it is my dreams you are treading on…”

I’m naming my rat Beyonce!

Wow…its been a long time since I’ve had a kiss of that
magnitude…that emotion…that raw energy…words couldn’t describe, at
least not in the fashion I would want….lets hope this goes well…

well i had another interesting dream…i’m trying to keep track of these things in the hopes that i’ll have an easier time remembering in the future.

i remember distinctly being in some sort of impending disaster, like we were in a car and something was going to explode or blow up or melt or something. it was like we were trapped inside a traffic tunnel of some sort, and emergency teams were there…they were rolling a large piece of black plastic over our heads, in some weird attempt to shield us from what was going to happen…i kept thinking in my head that it’s only going to melt or tear and it wasn’t going to protect anything, but i went along with the idea and covered us up. by us i mean me, scott and some girl, i don’t remember her face. we did this, i don’t think anything happened…at least not that i remember.

later i was inside some bar or something, and it turned out to be night trips, but it wasn’t really night trips. it was a different building, i’ve been in there before in another dream, same place and same idea that it was night trips. we ran into some people that we didn’t really know, like some of the people i was with knew them, but not me. i was drunk and was acting drunk, i couldn’t maintain composure or keep my thoughts clear…i remember seeing some guys there and one of them yelled at my friend…i told him he really sounds like a girl. turns out he was gay and didn’t get pissed but happy he sounded feminine. we ended up hanging out with him and his gay pals and they knew all the girls or something, so we were mingling with the gals…i then saw jezebel without all the original tattoos…she hugged me and asked me if i would accept her for all she is…and i told her yes. (must be some symbolism dealing with superficiality or something in my mind) shortly after i remember being on a bus with these people going somewhere, they were telling me stories of the things i did while i was drunk and such, i remember one saying some girl was in love with me but she was really fat, and the guy yelled to her “he doesn’t like you!” then he realized it was mean and said “no i mean he doesn’t like your SUV!” (i thought it was funny)

there was also something to do with a house…something about the back yard and some mexicans coming into my backyard and i told them “NO STEAL!” i tried to explain that they can take what is trashed or littered but not to steal my stuff…very strange.

then i woke up!