so sweet

haha, i found this on my LJ from december 2005.  i always laugh when i read it.

 

..> ..>

2:10 pm – so sweet
..> ..>

Brad,
It would be difficult for me to be any more miserable right now, I feel like the worst person ever. First, let me start by saying that I am truly truly sorry, and I hate myself for hurting you. Of all the people in the whole entire world, you were honestly the last person that I would ever want to wrong in any way. There is no excuse at all or anything that happened, so I won’t even try other than to say all of us had WAY too much to drink, and I did a stupid thing. I can handle you being pissed at me, I absolutely deserve it, I can even handle the ugly words that were exchanged between us, what I can’t handle is thinking that you see me as a different person.

It is weird, I feel like I just went through a horrible break up or something. The world looked funny yesterday, I couldn’t crack a smile if you paid me, there are songs I can’t listen to, and I just feel beyond crushed. I don’t know if you meant everything you said to me, and I am hoping that you didn’t. I know that I was wrong on many levels, but I am also hoping that this is something that we can deal with. I know it sounds totally crazy and stupid, but you have come to play such a significant role in my life, I can’t imagine my days without you. It is totally strange and weird to say that, and you could say that my behavior didn’t reflect that, and you would be correct. I hate feeling like you hate me, and I hate feeling like all of your friends think I am a terrible person, because I am not. I know there is nothing I can say or do to take back what happened, but I just want you to know that fighting with you was just about the worst thing I could have ever imagined. It was right up there with one of the ugliest nights of my life, and I would give anything in the world to rewind and fix it.

I am not sure if you will respond to this, part of me thinks that you won’t. If not today, then maybe some other time. Also, thanks for getting my stuff together, although I think my sunglasses are still at your house, if you could keep your eyes peeled for them that would be great.

I can’t even focus or work today, I can’t eat, I seriously feel like it was an ugly break up, and I am hoping against hopes that it was not that and you are not done with me. Please don’t cut me off, I really don’t think I can handle that.

I am so sorry.

Elizabeth

—————————————-—————————————-

Dear Elizabeth,

Thank you for your concern. I’ll be sure to file it away under “L” for “Long-winded diatribes from drunken whores I couldn’t care less about”. You did a stupid thing huh? No…doing long division and forgetting to carry the one is “a stupid thing”; Mixing in a red sock with a load whites is “a stupid thing”; Blowing some guy in a bathroom for 45 minutes while I sit at the bar wondering if you’re taking so long because you ate too much bran that morning isn’t as much a “Stupid thing” as it is grounds for permanent removal from my social calendar.

To be honest, I’m not sure if it was more amusing that you went and degraded yourself in a public toilet not once but twice in a 2 hour span, or that you seemed to think that by saying “Well, I didn’t F**k him” somehow gave you a clean slate. So forgive me if I couldn’t care less if the world “looked funny” to you yesterday. Since your world revolves around blow dryers, golden retrievers, Prada Bags and Jelly Beans, I’m sure it must have been most unsettling to actually have to consider someone else’s feelings for 24 hours straight.

The good news for you is that my friends don’t think you’re a terrible person, they just think you’re the average run of the mill cum-guzzling blond who commands about as much respect as your average child porn collector. I could be wrong but, it’s pretty hard to respect some B&T chick who comes out to spend the night at my place even though she’s seeing someone else in New jersey and winds up tongue-bathing the taint of anyone who decides 30 minutes of droning commentary on Colin Farrell’s new haircut is worth putting up with for a hand job in the men’s room. The good thing about being a guy is that when I eventually bump into the young lad who finger-blasted you on top of a towel dispenser last Saturday, we’ll have a shot and laugh our heads off about the time it happened.

By the way, for the amount of time you claim to spend in spin class you really must be doing something wrong to sport the thunder thighs you do. Watching you parade around my bedroom in a thong was a little like watching sea lions mate. Thought you might like to know.

PS. I BCC’d about 100 people on this email.
Talk to you never,

Brad

hair survey.

black or blonde?

if you need reference, go look through my pics.

——–

Daniel Self
well it appears that black is the higher preference, and not that i’m solely taking that opinion…but i also don’t have any bleach as i thought, and i DO have black, so…black it is this round!
Reply4 years ago

Montega
Black
Reply4 years ago

thomas dunlap
you got to be kidding me? come on d, wtf? you realize how gay it sounds to be soliciting( what-the-fuck-ever) us for hair styles? not even gonna call you a fag this time cause it’s sooooo obvious. do yall see why i give this nucklehead so much shit??

anyways, i remember back awhile, you had these blue tint- highlights in your hair, i thought that was pretty fucking cool looking. dark black hair with a blueish tint, thats the way to go my brother.

fag.
Reply4 years ago

Random
blondlack.
Reply4 years ago

Blue
Blonde
Reply4 years ago

Cindy
Blonde
Reply(1)4 years ago

Blake Cover
BLACK
Reply4 years ago

fux. *updated*

so, last night, i realized that NONE of my tail lights work on my car.

*update*
lo and behold…funny story…me n lashes laughed at my stupid turn signal noises all day because it was so fast and annoying…turns out that was the indication that some lights were out. thats what led to me finding out about the tail lights. anyway, before bitching at the car lot or blah blah, i pulled the back panel off to see if it had bulbs, see if they were out, etc. literally NONE of my back lights worked. no signals, no backup lights, no brake lights, nothing.
so…i pull the panel off.
and…both sides are fucking unplugged. wtf? yeah, simple fix, two bolts to take off the panel, then 2 seconds to plug in the harnesses on both sides. and fixed.
now i’m stress free!

———

Blue
You fixed a car? Wow!

My right turn signal was hyper for about a year before someone told me it was out. And here I thought it just decided to be awesome and spazz out.
Reply4 years ago

Kenneth
And I hate you so much for your default pic. I smoked myself into another sinus infection and so am trying to quit and then I see your pic and am now having a nic-fit. =-P

And did that just fucking rhyme? It’s too early in the morning for this shit. LOL
Reply4 years ago

Kenneth
Dude! Same thing happened to me last night, but it was all but one of my brake lights. LOL Yay for midnight trips to Wal-Mart for bulbs! I bet you’re the reason my Wal-Mart was out of the type of bulb I needed and had to drive across town. Bastard!

*shakes fist menacingly* 😉
Reply4 years ago

Christina Replogle
Hopefully its either a fuse or the bulbs…. so I guess you traded lights for airconditioning.. lol
Reply4 years ago

Blake Cover
You’re supposed to check that stuff out before you buy the car.
Reply4 years ago

12 minutes to type about such intensity…

i should devote more time…however, the chills have been surging through my body since sunday…
she would glance at me…playing those chosen songs…the ones so deeply meaningful to her, and from the words i could even tell…all those secrets that are never told, things that i knew…
“by your side i’ll stay forever”
as you so nervously and intently slid your fingers across my leg, as if you were reaching for something that terrified you, that perhaps you NEEDED to know i was there…and i was. and if the music weren’t so loud, you’d have heard me gasp so deeply when you squeezed my hand so tightly when i placed it over yours…our hands were pressed together as strongly as i was wishing to be holding you in that moment. i couldn’t breathe…your fingers may as well have been holding my heart at that one instant…
you’re magical. and you’re not even aware. i’ve listened to these songs over and over since, and my stomach has been in my throat each time, i just keep reliving that one small event over and over…
“i only want you to see my favorite part of me…”
but what you don’t understand…my favorite part is EVERYTHING. the beautiful and the ugly.
shehag once told me…that maybe all i needed was someone to be there for me in the way i’m always there for them…and i feel this is it. all those words were true…that i understand it’s all you want as well…it’s why we connected, it’s why we complement each other…you’re my rock and i’m yours. and i’ve understood it…i’ve figured it out…and i see now when you only want me by your side, silent…still…just THERE. when once i mistook it for being something else, i now understand you don’t want me to talk, you don’t want me to hug you, you don’t want me trying to make it better, you don’t want anything but the sanctity of me sitting next to you while you fight your way through your own darkness, just to be there to catch you when you need it. and that’s what i’ll do.
you’re still the one held above all others. you’ll always be.
“here i am standing up to say i only want to fall in love with you…forever”
the rain DOES always bring our heroes.
xoxo.

————

thomas dunlap
i say to myself,” he knows what i’m gonna say, he must enjoy it it”

fag.
Reply4 years ago

She B
dang daniel. what the fuck was that? did you enter to win a chance to make a hallmark card??
Reply4 years ago

an old birthday wish.

happy birthday, shehag. may your dreams continue to come true.

———

~Betty Jean~ Balch
how funny. I have one coming too but I hope you dont call me a shehag. That cracks my shit up!!! Have a good day D!!!
Reply4 years ago

your gentle, tender touch…

…sent shivers through my heart as your fingers intertwined with mine…and the way you squeezed my hand made everything feel like home.

—-

Duran Durangela
weak sauce
Reply4 years ago

air conditioning.

i finally got a car…that has working a/c!
i’ll post pics soon…i’m in a rush to go spend a lazy sunday afternoon with a friend.
i got a 2000 acura integra, dark green.
last night…was beautiful.

food?

ok seriously, WHO IN THE FUCK left a golden corral meal in a takeout box on my gawdamn porch? seriously? WHAT THE FUCK?

the day that we lost our souls

and now i remember why it hurts so much to care, why it hurts to be jealous, why it hurts to be arrogant, why it hurts to be insecure, why it hurts to be over-confident…
and i remember now why it feels so much better to be detached.
time to remember all of it…all of who i was before this, all of who i’ve always been without this bullshit in my way.
sometimes we have to know just when to give up on chasing dreams.

i’ve ran out of analogies for sleeping and dreams

in my dreams…you were mine.
your lips, your hands, your heart, your body…it was all mine.
i was there for you, as you were for me, i held you, i kissed you, i protected you…the ways i’ve done for so long in my mind and my fantasies…and it was beautiful.
i only remember bits and pieces though, simply that you were “home” waiting for me…you were excited to see me…you smiled…just so many little things.
i hated to wake up.
i’ve only had a taste…and even in dreams…it doesn’t compare to the delicacy of your lips against mine.